Competition vs. Uber-competition

I can’t leave this topic of the pitfalls of an uber-competitive environment. Earlier this week, I pulled out my Duke Magazine (the November/December 2011 issue) and read the article “Dreams, Fears, Pressures: Beneath the Surface.” It details the intense pursuit of perfection and the deep-seated fears the highly successful Duke undergraduates are feeling. In the library at Duke, students are able to write down their greatest hopes and fears. Here is a sample of those thoughts: 

• “loneliness” 
• “to not fulfill my own goals” 
• “accidentally hurting people, especially ones I care about” 
• “that I am damaged goods” 
• “having people realize that I am not as perfect as I try to be…” 
• “being alone” 
• “to give it all back to my parents” 
• “making my parents proud” 
• “to stop caring about the fact that I won’t be in med school” 

These are Duke students. Has the drive to compete, to be perfect, to meet parental expectations drained the humanity out of them? 

Do the quotes help you understand why Rivers subscribes to “Excellence with Humanity?” On one level, “Excellence with Humanity” signifies a balance between developing a competitive spirit, and discovering and developing talents and passions (being true to oneself). I know for some people, this balance is hard to comprehend. For some, getting ahead is the only thing that matters and they believe teaching kids how to do that is the job of independent schools. Indeed, competition is important and teaching students how to compete to improve their performance can be growth-inducing. But competition should be balanced with the legitimate pursuit of self-knowledge, the awakening of passions, the stuff that makes us human and ultimately will make us happy. This is the balance that Rivers strives for.

When schools create a super-competitive culture in which students are only striving for the gold ring of an Ivy League admit, they run the risk of graduating young people whose humanity has been stifled. Competition is a good thing; uber-competition is not.

Setting High Standards and Pursuing Passions

As I read David Brooks' brilliant editorial, "The Creative Monopoly," I could not help but think of Rivers and its mission. For some people, I suspect, The Rivers School “motto,” "Excellence with Humanity," presents a bit of a dilemma. The initial thought may be that excellence requires constant struggle, a super-competitive mindset, and a focus on defeating those around you in order to win the prize. Brooks acknowledges the importance of a competitive spirit but, he argues, that spirit taken to the nth degree can also stifle creativity and squash the discovery of individual passion. He writes:

“…students have to jump through ever-more demanding, preassigned academic hoops. Instead of developing a passion for one subject, they're rewarded for becoming professional students, getting great grades across all subjects, regardless of their intrinsic interests… they move into a ranking system in which the most competitive college, program, and employment opportunity is deemed the best. There is a status funnel pointing to the most competitive colleges and banks and companies, regardless of their appropriateness… Competition has trumped value-creation. In this and other ways, the competitive arena undermines innovation.”

This certainly describes the prep school I attended. As students, we were taught to compete; school was a form of academic boot camp. Learning was not intended to be fun or social; the only satisfaction we might glean from the experience was the bond of having all survived each learning experience. We counted ourselves as tougher than others; creativity, imagination, and passion all took a back seat to learning how to compete.

Rivers is different. It's true that we teach our students how to compete. We challenge them with high standards and a rigorous program. But learning how to compete at Rivers shares the spotlight with discovering talents and igniting passions. We demand students use their imaginations in order to cultivate their creative spirit. This calibration – this balance between teaching students how to compete while also fostering their creative spirit, their humanity – is the Rivers Way. It is sometimes difficult to understand this balance because we often spend a great deal of time in the "competitive myopia" as Brooks calls it. That myopia undermines innovation; it also undermines true happiness – people using their talents and passions to make the world a better place.